Made in China

China! An untapped auto market.

China! A land ripe for the taking by the world's automakers.

China! Home of awful auto designers!

I present to you:

The DongFeng D120

The Geely Forwind Concept

Bond has Balls of Steel

Just saw Casino Royale and my assessment that James Bond has balls again is spot on, more than I could have ever imagined.

That's current Bond girl Eva Green, a definite improvement over Denise Richards' turn as nuclear physicist Christmas Jones and whatever Halle Berry played. I'm not going to say anything further because I know you're distracted.



I am too.

Khaaaaaaaaaaaan!!!!!!!!!

I love ytmnd.com. It's my little happy place of cheap thrills. Granted, a lot of these random, looping gifs are in-jokes for internet geeks. Thankfully, growing up in the 80s means I'm likely to get a good percentage of them. And if not, I just laugh at the pure randomness of everything.

The other day I thought of Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan and the infamous rebel yell of one Capt. James T. Kirk. So I wondered, "What are the chances it would be posted on ytmnd.com?" Lo and behold I search "Khan" and get 641 results.

Here is the original scene in all its glory. Some other ones I find quite amusing are "Khan finds Waldo" and "Metal Gear Wrath of Khan." Unfortunately, the latter will go over your head unless you played Metal Gear Solid. But I've gotta say it's a sterling example of William Shatner's abnormal diction. "Do you????" I'm a geek.

I beg to differ Hasselhoff

Loved by Germans and lampooned by Americans, David Hasselhoff is complaining his role in reuniting East and West Germany to help end the Cold War hasn't been recognized.

"I find it a bit sad that there is no photo of me hanging on the walls in the Berlin Museum at Checkpoint Charlie," he told Spielfilm magazine.

I hate to break it to you David, but the reason you've been overlooked is because everyone knows that it was Rocky IV that ended the Cold War.

Bond has Balls Again

Or so the early reviews say. I wish film critics had the balls to actually say something so ballsy. Instead, we're stuck with the standard "Bond is Back!!!!" that ends up quoted in all of the film's advertising. And even if a maverick writer had such balls, it would never make it past the copy editors who generally take offense to anything and everything (and lack the balls to let these things go to print).

I believe in Daniel Craig('s balls).

Toilet Humour

I can accept being scared of what may lurk inside a toilet, but this is something completely different. The BBC is reporting that millions in the UK are afflicted with "Toilet Phobia." It's just awful.

"But, no matter how funny we might find it, it's certainly no laughing matter," says Nicky Lidbetter, a manager with the National Phobias Society.

If it wasn't November and for this story coming from the BBC, I'd be inclined to believe this was a joke with a source named Lidbetter. But he's right. This is no laughing matter. Really.

Flash! Aahhh!!

Of all the bad 80s movies that have aged to the point of hilariously awesome, Flash Gordon is definitely one of my top five selections.

There probably wasn't a better action/sci-fi/comedy in that decade or ever. Why?

To put it briefly, Flash Gordon, quarterback of the New York Jets jumps in a rocket with a mad professor and a pretty girl and flies to some random galaxy, befriends an army of hawkmen and saves the universe from Max von Sydow, err Ming the Merciless. All set to a rockin' soundtrack by Queen.

The awesomeness of this movie is almost as inexplicable as the fact that the DVD is incredibly rare and incredibly expensive. And just in case the movie experience is overwhelming to the point of brain dysfunction, you'll always know which dude is Flash Gordon. Just look for the shirt with FLASH on it.

Take a taste...

Wii 2, Me 0

I won't deny there were perks to being a journalist. Courtside seats at basketball games. Nice, warm cushy press box seating and sideline access at football games. Free meals of varying quality, ranging from barbecued slurry on a bun to bountiful buffets of beef, bratwurst and tater tots. A bunch of free t-shirts I'd never wear, ever. Random trinkets like magnets, mugs, mouse pads, all free.

The most random thing I ever got was a folder that held the press packet for "There's Something About Mary." It was covered in tan and taupe fabric so that it would resemble Ben Stiller's pants from the movie, complete with zipper fly (flesh and balls not included, thankfully).

My favorite perk, though, was having the privilege of watching a movie or listening to a new CD long before the general public did. Well, this applies to games too. I just found out that the UK branch of Nintendo is letting the British gaming press try the new Wii out in style by granting them access to the Wii House.

Given that my anticipation has reached the boiling point, I really envy that they're playing it now, in style and comfort no less. I do not, however, envy all the writing they will have to do.

Click The Mystery Link

Go ahead, click. It'll only take about of minute of your life. Even if you only had a minute to live, it would be worth it.

Wii 1, Me 0

I was content on waiting.

This is the last thing I need.

But with its launch a few weeks away, media coverage of the Wii is starting to ramp up. And Nintendo has broken me once again. The next time I'm in the country, I'm heading straight to the store and buying one.

New way of playing games. New Zelda. Empty bank account.