Lifestyles of the Rich and Gluttonous

When Fat Elvis wanted a sandwich, he really wanted a sandwich.

Hooray for sex!

It does a body good. Don't just take his word for it, read this. It's science!

Man, 'tis the season for movies

The fall season is definitely shaping up to be better for movies than the past summer did. First it was The Departed. Now it's The Prestige, a movie about magic fittingly directed by Christopher Nolan. As you'd expect from the director of Memento, he has some tricks up his sleeve for the audience. It's clever, engrossing and worth checking out.

Next up is Casino Royale. I believe in Daniel Craig...

Chuck Norris is serious

It was about a year ago when I came across the very very random facts about Chuck Norris. Well, Chuck Norris found them too. And in case you actually thought he played a hand in evolution or that his tears can cure cancer, the hairy one set the record straight...

A snippet:
Alleged Chuck Norris Fact: "Chuck Norris' tears can cure cancer. Too bad he never cries. Ever."

There was a man whose tears could cure cancer or any other disease, including the real cause of all diseases – sin. His blood did. His name was Jesus, not Chuck Norris.

If your soul needs healing, the prescription you need is not Chuck Norris' tears, it's Jesus' blood.

Thanks, Chuck. Thanks...

Farewell Schumi

Formula 1 racing just won't be the same next season. I've been following the sport for 10 years and whether I liked it or not, I could always count on Michael Schumacher being at the front. Now he won't be there at all, retiring after Sunday's Brazilian Grand Prix.

A hero and a villain to millions the world over, he won a record seven world championships over his 16-year career. I cheered him on in 2000 when he returned Ferrari to greatness by winning the automaker's first driver's title in 21 years. I cursed at him when he utterly dominated the field, often in unsportsmanlike ways, to win several more. It's weird, I know. But in his final season, I couldn't help but root for him once again as he made a late-season push to try and win one final championship. He ultimately came up short, but it was during that stretch that I truly appreciated his ability to go faster than anyone else on four wheels, regardless of what car he was driving. I may never see anyone like him in my lifetime again.

There's still going to be a Schumacher racing next season with his younger brother Ralf piloting the Toyota, but it just won't be the same. It's kind of like that whole Frank Stallone thing.

This gives new meaning to 'Morning wood'

It's kind of like those race-car beds. For adults.

Goodbye urban wasteland

Hello beach life.

Human skin on pigskin action

If you grew up watching football in the 80s, there's a good chance you remember barefoot kickers. But did you ever understand why they kicked barefoot? I sure didn't. My favorite pop-culture essayist Chuck Klosterman dares to care.

Say hello to Mr. Poon

I would've posted this sooner but I never had a camera handy when driving by. It's a restaurant by the way, specializing in steamed fish.

Tara Reid = Smart

Because when you're "perfect," that means you should go ahead and have plastic surgery to fix those, um...imperfections. Thanks to her "plastic surgery nightmare" she'll just have to settle on being delusional and drunk. No wait...

Good vibrations

Go watch The Departed and let Marky Mark insult his way into your heart like he did with mine. He was perfect. I don't think he'll ever have a more fitting part than this.

The movie's pretty good as well. HK remake or not, it's better than anything else that's come out this year. By a longshot.

This mall's got everything...

...that no one in America wears anymore.

Every now and then I head to Gateway Mall to watch movies in La-Z-Boy recliners and get my Taco Bell fix. The mall looks nice and tries to be upscale but fails miserably due to the presence of Marithe Francois Girbaud and L.A. Gear stores. Yeah you read that right. Girbaud jeans and L.A. Gear are alive and well in the PI. Even better, the local equivalent of Macy's/Nordstrom's was selling Z. Cavariccis. Sooner or later I'm going to stumble upon some Zubaz pants and Hypercolor shirts...

The Philippines - where failed brands get a second chance!

Shave you hairy bastards

Sam's Town is out and after my initial listen from start to finish, my fears were true: their transition from pretty boys to dirtbags affected their music. They went from platinum to suck. But a couple more listens and I'm starting to feel better about the album. It's growing on me, unlike their hair.

The L is for Losers

Dear Detroit Lions,

You suck.

Love,
The Philippines